The thought of going on a mission trip to a third world country completely terrified me even just two years ago. My best friend in the entire world decided that she would move to Narobi, Kenya, well actually a remote village (orphanage) four hours outside of Narobi for an entire year and serve in June 2008 and I remember thinking she must be the bravest person I know. I remember saying to her, God is calling me to support you financially and to pray, but never to go! Lindsey, my best friend, completely trusted God’s plan and calling… she quit her job, packed her bags, and moved to Tumaini and absolutely loved her life with these precious children at the orphanage. Around the same time she moved to Africa, I moved to Charlotte and began attending Forest Hill. I joined a Lifegroup, and my leader was Kasey, who is now my best friend in Charlotte. Shortly after starting this group, Kasey felt called to go to the DR Congo. I didn’t know much about the Congo, but after many talks with her found out that it was one of the poorest countries and actually very unsafe. I was like, okay God, why are my friends all going out of the country and what are you trying to teach me by showing me that my friends can do this?
We read and studied a book by Francis Chan, called Crazy Love in our group in 2009, and the Holy Spirit completely started changing my heart from wanting to support my friends on mission trips to wanting to go. I remember telling the girls in my group that I felt like God was calling me to go, but I didn’t know where and I was completely scared out of my mind. I prayed a lot about what this would look like and honestly put it off for a long time. In early 2010, I decided to take a leap of faith and signed up to go to Senegal with my church, but that wasn’t the trip for me. At first I saw that as God closing the door, but in February 2011, I went to see my local eye doctor and for some reason God orchestrated Dr. Knudson and I to have a conversation about what church we go to and somehow I told him about the cancelled mission trip to Senegal, and that is when he told me that his neighbor was George Collins, who runs Bless Back Worldwide. Long story short, within weeks, I submitted my application, and that October I went on my first trip to Les Cayes, Haiti and met the sweet children of Cambry.
I had never been more scared of anything in my whole life, from what diseases I could get to getting too hot (anyone who knows me knows how hot natured I am), but I knew God had called me to this place and I was excited to be doing His will. I remember the first day I was somewhat in a state of shock, but I love kids more than anything in this world, so I thought I would fit right in. The truth is, I didn’t. I somewhat let fear take over. I had never been around kids that were not clean, kids who had scabbies, lice or things I didn’t even know, and I was so afraid at first to touch them. I had to continually pray that I would get over my fears and remember that these are children of God and that they desperately need to feel loving arms around them! Luckily our gracious and loving Heavenly Father allowed me to be less cautious and I did enjoy my time with these children, but I think part of me had just never seen anything like this before so it was a lot of processing for me.
One little girl did manage to steal my heart though, little Jasmine. I was part of the medical team; working in the pharmacy all week. Each day she would stop by the pharmacy and she would help me; my little assistant if you will. She would throw things away for me, she would sit on my lap, she would sit beside me, and of course I would sneak and give her protein bars (I don’t like them so she got even more, because I gave her the ample supply I packed) or whatever just to be close to me. I had never experienced a child wanting to just sit near you, wanting to be held, or just wanting to be loved like this and it definitely affected me. Many people call Friday nights at Cambry the cry fest, because you have to tell the children bye and it is a sad time, on our Friday night trip in October we played a slide show of the kids and they loved it. Afterwards, most of the other team members were sobbing and their favorite little kids were as well. I had gotten a little emotional during the slideshow, but had gotten the impression from Jasmine that she wasn’t going to be my crier. I gave her a hug and told her that I would miss her, be praying for her, and that I loved her. She simply gave me a hug and walked off. I asked Dimy, the fourteen-year old where she was going, and he said, “To bed.” At first I thought, man, she didn’t really like me that much, but later was praising God for his provision. You see, I am super emotional and sensitive by nature. Had He sent me or allowed me to get close to a little boy or girl in Haiti that cried when I was leaving, I would have been in hysterics and would not have been able to leave. God knew what he was doing all along.
After we returned, the Orphan Sponsorship program started, and I sponsor Jasmine. I absolutely love being able to send her little care packages and notes with pictures. After we returned I didn’t think I would go back, the trip was the most rewarding, but yet the most challenging thing I had ever experienced. I thought if I do go back it will be years down the road, but God had other plans. My team leaders, the Ropers, who I cannot speak highly enough about were leading a team to go back in July 2012. I prayed and prayed and God said, “GO.”
I just returned from my second trip to Cambry, and this time was so different. I wasn’t nervous at all this time. My heart was so ready, and I have never been so ready to wrap my arms around a little girl in my whole life. I want her to know Psalm 139 more than anything. I have been praying this for her. I want her to know that she is not forgotten, that she is so loved by our Heavenly Father, and that He has great plans for her life. Unfortunately, I got a fever on our way to Haiti, and our medical lead for our trip advised me not to go to the first church service on Sunday, but the second service was with the kids and I hadn’t had a chance to see Jasmine yet. I somehow managed to get enough Tylenol in my system and enough energy to go to that service, and when we walked in, and I saw that smile on her face, I knew I was just where God wanted me to be. A few minutes later, that sweet smile and all of her funny faces was wedged in my lap and I kind of forgot I was sick. The week I got to spend with Jasmine was amazing! She has great personality, lots of sass, loves to help in the pharmacy, sings Jesus Loves Me in the sweetest little tone, but can run with the boys too. She has an older brother and goodness that girl hits and can be a typical nine year old. She is always smiling or making a funny face, and the infectious joy she has, has taught me so much. There are many days when I just want to sit and complain, but then I remember that the conditions she lives in are not ideal, to most here in the states that are unbearable and would be considered unfathomable, but she said to me on Friday afternoon, “I’ll pray for you daily.” She and the other children at Cambry, don’t focus on what they do not have, they praise God for what they do! Jasmine’s older brother Noel is at the orphanage with her, and I was able to speak to him a little one night at the guest house, and Angela, another faithful bless back volunteer sponsors him and knows his story very well. Noel told me that his mother is dead, but his father is still living. He has other siblings, I believe he told me four brothers and four other sisters. My heart completely broke for him and Jasmine, but not Noel, he just kind of told me and then I gave him a hug and told him I loved him. Things we would be devastated and paralyzed by, these kids find joy and a reason to be thankful.
Cambry and more specifically Jasmine have opened my eyes to a whole new world, one where I want and need to be thankful for every single blessing the Lord sends me. Honestly sleeping in a room where animals cannot get to me, sleeping in a soft bed, having food to eat at any time of the day, having a working toilet (plumbing in general), having clean clothes, having access to doctors when I am sick, and so much more are things that we all take for granted. I am so thankful for the two opportunities I have had to go to Cambry, and I pray that God will tell me when to go again. Until then, I will be praying for little Jasmine as I look at her picture on my nightstand each night. A part of my heart will always be in Haiti.
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. Psalm 139: 13-14
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