i don't really have a lot of fears/phobias (you all probably know my biggest one:: someone breaking into my house), but i may add a new one after this week.
so, monday morning i awake to the news that there has been a horrible EF5 tornado that devastated Joplin, MO. obviously, the devastation that i saw in these pictures broke my heart, and i immediately began praying for the people affected by this storm. it became a little more real for me, as i was leaving for Kansas City, MO in just a few hours. i had a face to face meeting with all the other monitors for work in overland park, ks. i thought, i really do not want to go to tornado alley, but i have no choice. as you can imagine, once we arrived, all we heard about was Joplin. It was on every newscast and the threat of more tornadoes was on the way.
fast forward to wednesday, the last day of our meeting. presentations were scheduled to be over at 11am and then we were to be given an exam on the knowledge that we had gained while at the meeting. (really, is this a college class?) around 10:55 am the tornado siren goes off... the monitor who is from the area obviously knew what the sound was, and she said, we need to take cover and head downstairs (we were on the 4th floor). we walk out into the hallway, and all the employees from this office look like they are freaking out (some are even crying). i am thinking, wait, yall are from here, aren't you used to this? I was trying to stay calm, pray, find my cell (to text my mother and friends), and get to the "Safe Zone." we finally get to the first floor and it is total chaos. people are crying and heading to the bathroom, people are trying to call loved ones, and my crazy team leads huddle us up and say, "we really have to have you guys take this exam, as senior management needs to know this meeting was beneficial." i am thinking are they nuts, i am trying to pray, text updates to my mother (who I am pretty sure was beyond freaking out), and not freak out. how am i to focus on this test on heart failure; let's face it, i already have major test anxiety anyway. so, we take the test and we've been down there for about 40 minutes.
at this point, our super shuttle arrives to take us to the airport. i am thinking, i may not know a lot about tornadoes and what not to do, but i do know the car is the worst place you can be. regardless of my thoughts, decisions were made and we piled in. we arrive at the airport only to be delayed for quite a while, but in the end it all worked out.
i was so thankful for God's protection that day. after seeing the destruction in Joplin, you just never know. we did later find out that a tornado did touch down three miles from the Quintiles office building.
So, I get home on Wednesday night and think about how thankful I am to be back in NC where I cannot be affected by tornadoes; however, last night on my way home I get a call from my mother and brother telling me that there is a tornado on the way to my house, no seriously, the meterologists were saying, the tornadic activity, swirling winds, etc are heading to mt. holly-huntersville rd and paw creek, well if someone could put a bullseye on my house, that would be it, literally. i literally have no ever been that scared, as the whole time i am driving they are giving me minute by minute updates. i am pretty sure i was driving right into the path of the storm; cereal boxes, tree limbs, and sideways rain were blocking my view. my car started swaying back and forth and i was terrified. my brother told me to get out of the car and get in a ditch, but i was determined that i was going to outrun a tornado, am i stupid. i finally get to my townhouse, literally i think i pulled into my front yard, and the wind was blowing so hard that i could barely get myself into my house. i run in and get in the hall closet and hold on with all my strength. my mom and i prayed while i was in the closet. i had peace, but i was scared at the same time. ten minutes later, the warning passed and once again, God protected me:) Seriously, PRAISE THE LORD.
what a crazy week of storms, bad weather, and tornado warnings... i am so thankful for His love and protection... also for my mother and brother who were looking out for me. also, i want to throw out there how thankful i am for aaron, jenn's husband, calling me five times while i was in the closet and checking on me.. thanks!
now, here's to a fun memorial day and NO MORE tornado warnings, please:)
Friday, May 27, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
Guilty as charged!!!
so, i get this little nugget or devotion the other day and read it this morning. can i just say that i am totally guilty of this. praying that i will be patient and remember that God is trying to teach me, build my character, and that He loves me:) I hope you enjoy this devotion as well. The truth is every time another one of my friends goes on a date, gets married, or has a child, I need to read this devotion. I know that my God hasn't forgotten me, and I will be completely fine if I do not get married. There is more to life than finding a husband. God has a calling for my life, and I pray that I will continue to seek His will, and that I will not lose sight of the most important thing which is to grow closer to my personal Savior.
Answer Envy
Karen Ehman
"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Jeremiah 33:3 (NIV)
Do you ever envy God's answers to someone else's prayers?
I remember almost choking on the words, "I am so happy for you!" in response to the breaking news that friends of ours from North Carolina had sold their house after it had been on the market for twenty days.
To them it had been a long twenty days. Houses were normally snatched up quickly in their area. In our shaky Michigan economy, however, it takes a bit longer. In fact, on the day she announced that her home now had a "sold" sign in the front yard, we turned another page on our calendar — marking how long our house had been for sale. Not twenty days, but twenty months to be exact.
Although I was genuinely thrilled for my friend, I was also a tad green with jealousy.
I call this answer envy. It is that "poor me" mentality that creeps into my heart when God answers someone else's prayers more quickly than mine. Or when He responds to them with a "yes" but His answer seems to be a "no" for me, or at least a "not right now."
I've had my fair share of answer envy outbreaks over the years, at all stages of life.
As a child, I was envious of the kids who came from two-parent homes while I resided in a family torn apart by divorce. No matter how hard I folded my little hands and prayed to God, my daddy didn't come back to us.
In high school, it was other girls' good looks, cute clothes or even cuter boyfriends that I longed for. Instead, I was granted average looks and wore department store blue-light-special fashions. And, as sports editor of our school paper, although I was every guy's pal, I was usually nobody's gal.
In college, I envied those whose prayers for a knight in shining armor, complete with sparkly diamond ring, were answered while I remained single. Once married, I struggled with miscarriage and dashed dreams of motherhood. So, for five long years, I slapped a smile on my face to mask my broken heart and attended yet another pale pink or baby blue church shower.
Over the years I have discovered that the cure for answer envy is not always easy because I must play an active role in my own healing.
What I need is a shift in perspective. When I "call to God" as encouraged in today's key verse, I must trust that He will keep His word. He will tell me "great and unsearchable things" that I do not know. Sometimes those things are the answers to my request. However, do you know what those great and unsearchable things more often are? They are the reasons He seems not to be answering my original request!
So, instead of only begging God to "sell my house" or "take away my pain" or "fix my kid," I need also to ask myself some questions. Questions like, "What is my Creator trying to teach me that I might never learn if He were to suddenly pluck me out of this situation?" Or, "What character qualities is He trying to grow in me? Patience, trust, compassion, contentment?"
Not available in quick microwave form, the cure for answer envy must be cultivated moment by moment.
We must believe that God will answer. He will clearly say "yes," "no," or "not right now." He is able, ready and willing to answer our prayers — here is the catch — as He sees fit and to grow us to be more like His Son in the process.
It took two years until our "for sale" sign was finally replaced with a "sold" banner. It was a long stay in God's waiting room. However, I now know this to be true: I must not merely seek the answer to my prayer. Instead, I must seek a deeper relationship with the answer Giver.
Dear Lord, thank You for Your perfect plans... Your perfect timing... and the perfect way Your development happens in my times of waiting. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Answer Envy
Karen Ehman
"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Jeremiah 33:3 (NIV)
Do you ever envy God's answers to someone else's prayers?
I remember almost choking on the words, "I am so happy for you!" in response to the breaking news that friends of ours from North Carolina had sold their house after it had been on the market for twenty days.
To them it had been a long twenty days. Houses were normally snatched up quickly in their area. In our shaky Michigan economy, however, it takes a bit longer. In fact, on the day she announced that her home now had a "sold" sign in the front yard, we turned another page on our calendar — marking how long our house had been for sale. Not twenty days, but twenty months to be exact.
Although I was genuinely thrilled for my friend, I was also a tad green with jealousy.
I call this answer envy. It is that "poor me" mentality that creeps into my heart when God answers someone else's prayers more quickly than mine. Or when He responds to them with a "yes" but His answer seems to be a "no" for me, or at least a "not right now."
I've had my fair share of answer envy outbreaks over the years, at all stages of life.
As a child, I was envious of the kids who came from two-parent homes while I resided in a family torn apart by divorce. No matter how hard I folded my little hands and prayed to God, my daddy didn't come back to us.
In high school, it was other girls' good looks, cute clothes or even cuter boyfriends that I longed for. Instead, I was granted average looks and wore department store blue-light-special fashions. And, as sports editor of our school paper, although I was every guy's pal, I was usually nobody's gal.
In college, I envied those whose prayers for a knight in shining armor, complete with sparkly diamond ring, were answered while I remained single. Once married, I struggled with miscarriage and dashed dreams of motherhood. So, for five long years, I slapped a smile on my face to mask my broken heart and attended yet another pale pink or baby blue church shower.
Over the years I have discovered that the cure for answer envy is not always easy because I must play an active role in my own healing.
What I need is a shift in perspective. When I "call to God" as encouraged in today's key verse, I must trust that He will keep His word. He will tell me "great and unsearchable things" that I do not know. Sometimes those things are the answers to my request. However, do you know what those great and unsearchable things more often are? They are the reasons He seems not to be answering my original request!
So, instead of only begging God to "sell my house" or "take away my pain" or "fix my kid," I need also to ask myself some questions. Questions like, "What is my Creator trying to teach me that I might never learn if He were to suddenly pluck me out of this situation?" Or, "What character qualities is He trying to grow in me? Patience, trust, compassion, contentment?"
Not available in quick microwave form, the cure for answer envy must be cultivated moment by moment.
We must believe that God will answer. He will clearly say "yes," "no," or "not right now." He is able, ready and willing to answer our prayers — here is the catch — as He sees fit and to grow us to be more like His Son in the process.
It took two years until our "for sale" sign was finally replaced with a "sold" banner. It was a long stay in God's waiting room. However, I now know this to be true: I must not merely seek the answer to my prayer. Instead, I must seek a deeper relationship with the answer Giver.
Dear Lord, thank You for Your perfect plans... Your perfect timing... and the perfect way Your development happens in my times of waiting. In Jesus' Name, Amen.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)